Wednesday, September 26, 2012

Fiction Writing Develops Like a Love Affair

Image credit: 123rf.com
Is there a story you would like to tell the world? Many people admit that they would love to write a book one day; however, not everyone ends up writing one. If you are one of those people who are eager to turn their aspirations into a short story or novel, you might find it useful to learn what goes into the writing process, or an affair with your book, metaphorically. Here are a few stages you are likely to go through:

1. Brainstorming, or "falling in love." You come up with an idea, and soon enough you become obsessed with it. You feel it's going to be a great story, but you are unsure how to approach the subject of you passion, i.e. how to write the story you have in mind. This stage might be short or long, depending on you. Some people like to outline, while others prefer to think it through and then sit down and get straight to writing.

2. The first draft, or "the fist date." This is the time when you are not worried about a long-term relationship. You just get it all out on paper; you are not concerned about grammar, or character development. All you need to know at this point is what your story will be, in a rough draft. Will it be a short fiction piece, or a few years' work? This is the best, most romantic stage because you can bring out the best of your creative abilities without any restraints.

3. Revising and editing, or "the commitment stage." As no relationship goes without arguments and compromises, no first draft is final unless you give up on your book whatsoever. Even though revising and editing are parts of the same process, there is a significant difference between the two. When you revise, you build up the story by means of inserting stronger scenes, or developing characters making them better-rounded and more fascinating to the reader. As soon as you know you've written the best story you could, you can move to editing - polishing your grammar and syntax, as well as finding better words to express your ideas. This is the most difficult and labor-intensive stage. The more effort you put into your"relationship," the better your book will be.

4. Submitting your work to publishers, or "the engagement period." At this point, you know that you want to get your book to print, and you need to find an agent in order to achieve your goal. Similar to the preparation for a wedding, a lot of research is going into submitting your work to publishers. You have to know who might be interested in what you've written and find the best way to present it to them. During the process, you might encounter lots of refusals, but don't get discouraged. Luckily, there are plenty of publishers, and there will be someone who would love to publish your book. When you get refusals, pay attention to what the reasons were. Maybe you need to tighten up your writing, or maybe they are looking for a different kind of stories. "Engagement period" is always stressful, but also rewarding - when it's over, your book will finally see the world.

5. Post-publishing period, or "the honeymoon." This is the sweetest time of all. Your goal is achieved, and your book is now on Barnes and Nobles bookshelves, or on Amazon. You might be going to book signings and promote your novel/story through all your social networks. Enjoy; you worked hard for it, and in the meantime, decide what your next book will be about, and start the process all over again.

Tuesday, September 18, 2012

9 Ideas for Stress Relief

image credit:
FreeDigitalPhotos.net



The economy is tough. Prices go up, and salaries remain the same. In addition, many people, not only in the US, but all over the world live in constant fear of being laid off. There's so much stress in our everyday lives that we just need to let it go and treat ourselves every so often. Here are some good ways to help yourself and let the steam out:

1. Get a massage. It is great for relaxing tight spots on your back and letting your mind go.  Yeah, it might be expensive, especially if you are a deep tissue massage lover, and your motto is, "If it doesn't hurt, it doesn't work." However, don't forget that there are Living Social and Groupon deals that might help you out.

2. Spend a day in a bathhouse. When you catch an occasional cold, your fever helps to sweat the infection out. Using a sauna creates artificial fever that works just as well. Switch back and forth between sauna and cold shower until you are exhausted, peel off a great deal of dead skin cells, and feel like a totally new person.

3. Sleep well. Modern world is fast-paced, and we often have to get more than one job to be able to pay for everything we need. However, never cut back on sleep. When you doze off, your body relaxes and restores its power. If your cell phone battery is drained, you can't make a phone call. Similarly, if you don't get enough rest, your body crashes, and you get sick. Therefore, cut back on watching TV and surfing the web if you have to, and make it a nice zzzz time.

4. Always get at least one day off a week. Everyone needs a no-obligation day. You would think that it's better having no days off and work eight hours as opposed to toiling for fifteen hours and have that one day to yourself. You are wrong if you think that. Not only do you have to tend to various chores like laundry and housekeeping, but you also need to let your mind forget about the job and everything that goes with it, and enjoy something you love doing (sometimes it is sleeping, which is totally fine).

5. Get together with old friends. People who love you unconditionally and make you laugh will always make your day brighter. If you're feeling stressed out, it often helps to talk to someone who can give you a piece of advice, or support you with kind words. Don't keep it all to yourself. Share with someone who cares. Sometimes talking about your problems is a relief in itself.

6. Try a new hobby. Learning occupies your mind and leaves less time for worrying. Maybe it's time to take weaving classes, or start dancing. Whatever it is you have always wanted to try, go for it. As a bonus, you will make new friends and might even create meaningful connections. It all depends on what your goals are.

7. Get a pet. Caring for someone uses up the energy you would normally devote to stressing yourself out. Walking a dog is not only picking up its poop; it is also admiring the beauty of a park in the autumn at 5 am. A purring kitty warms up your lap like no blanket ever will. Animals are good listeners and devoted friends, so if you don't have one, you should adopt one and see how rewarding it is.

8. Exercise. "Here we go again," you might say. But working out is crucial. It pushes your body to burn calories, speeds up your metabolism, tightens up your muscles and makes you feel good. Our bodies are intended to be active. Run if you like, walk, or take a yoga class. Don't turn it into a routine. Instead, experiment and keep it interesting. Doing the same thing over and over will eventually bore you, and you will give up on that gym, no matter how close to your house, or work, or school it is.

9. And finally, don't let the stress demons possess you. Show who's the boss and be the master of your own fortune. It is your choice whether to sit there and whine how miserable your life is, or to make a move and do something good for yourself and others. 

Wednesday, September 12, 2012

Teaching a Child Manners

image crédit:
etiquetteoutreach.com
Living in a metropolis like New York City, many of us have to commute to work, school or other places of interest, and a train ride often lasts for an hour or even longer. There are smelly foods eaten by those who haven't had time for a proper lunch, loud music piercing through someone's headphones, and two ladies (often Chinese) screaming at each other from the opposite sides of the car. What can make it worse? A yelling nine year old riding the train with his/her parents, who say nothing to the brat as though wailing into another passenger's ear is an absolutely normal thing to do.

If you are one of those parents, please, do the community and yourself a favor; educate them before it's too late. Note: education is not yelling and beating, but rather teaching the child to be aware and considerate of people around, which one day along the road will include you as well.

Here is what you can do to teach your youngster some manners:

1. Explain what is rude and disrespectful, for example kicking people or staring at them. They would not want someone do that to them, so they shouldn't do it either.

2. Channel their attention. Make sure they are occupied at all times. A book or some cartoons will do. If they are entertained and busy, they won't have time for screaming.

3. Persuade them to behave like adults. Children love to be treated as equals, and they hate to be called "cry babies," so use this to your advantage.

4. Pay attention to the child's needs. Why is he/she screaming? Is it hunger or desire to be noticed? Listening to your children helps understand and correct the behavior.

5. And finally, let them know that what they are doing is wrong and it upsets you. You need to teach them to respect and please you, so why not start doing it now?

And remember: children are not born naughty or obedient. Everything depends on you, from their first lesson in manners to their bright future you definitely want them to have.

Wednesday, September 5, 2012

How to Build Up Your Credit History and Not Go Broke

Image credit:
blog.studentloannetwork.com

Looking back at the summer of 2007 when I just moved to New York City, I remember my first disappointment: I couldn't get a plan with AT&T. I was denied because my credit history was not established, and I was offered to pay a deposit of $500 in order to get a two-year contract with the company. The money was supposed to be returned a year after, but it seemed like a lot to pay compared to Sprint and T-Mobile, and I walked out of the store promising myself that I would work on establishing my credit history.

Easier said than done. I tried applying for credit cards at Macy's, Sleepy's, Century 21 and online, and I was denied again and again. Sometimes I'd just fill up an application knowing in advance that there would be a letter in the mail to inform me that there was "insufficient information" on me, or something of the kind. People consoled me saying that no credit history is better than bad credit history, but I knew there had to be something I could do to start building up my credit, and thus my research began.

What I learned was that building up your credit is actually not so difficult once you get your foot in the door, which in itself is not easy. One of the things you can do if you are in the same boat I was is to go to your bank and ask if they can give you a secured credit card meaning that you will have to deposit a few hundreds and they will use the money as your credit limit for a few months. As soon as you start paying back and they see that you are trustworthy, your credit history will boost, and you will get lots of offers in the mail.

In the meantime, keep applying for the credit cards you receive offers for. As I was ready to request a secured credit card, I got an offer from Capital One and - wow - they said yes!

A few months after I paid each of my bills on time, my mailbox was loaded with other offers. When it happens to you, see what annual percentage rates (APRs) are better than the one you already have. You want to aim for 10-12%, while your first offer might be around 25%, for the lack of a better proposal. There usually are cards from banks like Credit One that charge you twice as much interest compared to more established banks, plus high annual and maintenance fees. Avoid those at all cost. Believe me, there are better deals. Keep looking.

Be careful, though: that first credit card will supply you with some "free" money you can spend on anything you wish. The "free" is actually not free; you will have to pay it back eventually, so use it wisely. As your credit history boosts, your credit limit will become bigger and bigger, and there will be more temptations. When the desire to buy something is unbearable, always remember that if you don't pay back, you will get hit by high interest, and if you only pay the minimum amount every month, it might take you over a year to pay back the debt; therefore, it might be a good idea to evaluate how much you can pay every month without having to starve or limit yourself in other ways.

And by the way, you should never use up all the credit limit. You are usually given 25-28 days to pay your balance, and if you don't, you will be charged interest, depending on the amount you owe and the APR, which takes from your credit limit as well. In addition, we all have unplanned expenses we use the credit card for, so it's a good idea to have some extra money just in case the car breaks down and the repair is time-sensitive.

Finally, when you credit history is good enough and you have a few accounts, always monitor the cards even if you don't use them. Make sure there are no fraudulent charges on any of them. If you see something suspicious on your statement, go to your bank and make matters clear. It is very important that you know how much you spend and what charges you or other authorized users are responsible for, and which ones you had nothing to do with.

If you do everything right and always pay on time, you will earn a good credit score, and a lot of doors will open in front of you. In the end of 2011 I finally got an I-phone with AT&T, deposit-free, and I received a few offers for car loans, and let me tell you something: good credit score is much better than no credit score, so there is no reason for you not to start establishing your credibility and enjoy things you can't pay in cash for.